“Well maybe the real God uses tricks. Maybe He’s not omnipotent, He’s just been around so long, He knows everything!”

The footsteps should echo off the sides of the brambled path, but they don’t. A hand reaches up to gently tug aside a sliver of branch, lest it should snag the flowing, white beard. He hates it when that happens.

He stops to allow a procession of ants to complete their journey across the sloping terrain, the economy of movement, the uniform tap of a thousand tiny legs skittering across the grass and sand. He likes those; particularly proud of them in fact. A slight pause before continuing on allows an emerald-green lizard to crawl across his sandaled foot. It stops for just a moment, black eyes quiescent, before darting off again into the thick grass bordering the path.

The path bends to the left, opening out onto a breathless vista. An immense lake stretches out the span of a few miles. On its far bank, a forest of regal pines have taken up watch, sheltered by a brooding mountain, its solitary peak grasping up at the sky. The surface of the lake is mirror-like, reflecting the outrageous shapes of the late afternoon clouds, every delicate shade of blue finding in it a twin. He waves an outstretched hand over the surface, which shimmers in response, and suddenly its as if a million pinpricks of light are blinking in and out of existence, a noise like static rushing out in a billowing discharge.

“Bloody reception!” The voice drowns out the noise of the static, seems to take possession of the air, a heavy and tangible reverberation.

He closes his eyes, the stirring of a slight breeze the only indication that something is changing. Then, imperceptibly at first, that lonely peak starts to shift. A little to the left, a little more, and then at a slight angle. Although to look at the scene again, the peak could have been jutting out like that since the beginning of time.

The hand hovers across the lake again, and again it shimmers. This time, however, a clear picture begins to take shape.

“Much better…” The voice is almost a grumble, if such a thing were possible.

The image in the lake appears to be part of a city. A man in a suit sits on the stairs of an important looking building, eating a sandwich as steam rises from the polystyrene cup next to him. The incessant hooting of a car horn finally stops when a burly man gets out of his car and begins to gesture wildly at no-one in particular. On every sidewalk, people are in constant motion. Some look up, others down. After a while, its confusing as to whether the chaos is governed by the traffic lights, or the lights above the storefronts.

“Gabriel!” The voice seems to tremor between octaves. “Where’s my freakin’ Maj Jong?”

A snap of the fingers, and the mountain, forest and sky are once more reflected in the surface of the lake. He settles down on a nearby bench, spots a golden figure materialize in the corner of his eye, and sighs.

“God, I hate reality tv……”

~ by tenmiles on October 4, 2005.

11 Responses to ““Well maybe the real God uses tricks. Maybe He’s not omnipotent, He’s just been around so long, He knows everything!””

  1. I don’t like you much no more …

    Why you have to go and write this absolutely wonderful beautiful amazing lyrical imaginative funny brilliant glowing shining luminescent thing you just did hmmm?

    And in your freakin’ lunch break.

  2. You are very skilled with description and the flow of language. Bravo! This notion solves the old conundrum: “If God is omnipotent, can he create a stone so large that he can’t lift it?”

  3. Brilliant!
    I’m making my usual otter impersonation.

  4. You have astonished me with this piece. Your writing is saturated with a brilliance that can surprise at every turn. Are you able to admit to that yet, ‘F’?

  5. This post has been removed by a blog administrator.

  6. I can only echo what the others have already said.
    I envy yor gift, dammit! 🙂 I’m signing up for lessons.

  7. Hahahaha! Loved the title!

  8. We’re not worthy! [grovelling & bowing]

  9. Luke – It must have been a really good lunch… ;~)

    Jason – And if it is too heavy, and he drops it in a forest, will anyone hear?

    Anne – Er, otter? As in your first instinct is to dive into the water and swim away?

    Livewire – Nope, still not yet

    Chitty – Er, which gift would that be? My gift for procrastination? For making it look like I’m working when nothing could be further from the truth?

    JB – Me too! It’s from Groundhog Day, if anyone is wondering.

    Kyknoord – Nonsense! (blushing profusely)

    Er…no, that doesn’t mean you can stand up yet……

  10. oooh, that made me giddy.
    on a number of levels.

    not least of which was your nod to Bill Murray.


  11. this is from ground hog day

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